i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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