CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize
