We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think a kid would responsible me up
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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