Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer

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(512): Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer http://tfl.nu/pw3y

Replies (16) Good night (1729) Bad night (2139)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...

(1-609): View more from New Jersey

and?

(609): View more from New Jersey

RIP clitoris

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(609): I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there... (1-609): and? (609): RIP clitoris http://tfl.nu/1ub6

Replies (597) Good night (5577) Bad night (102778)
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(415): View more from California

worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.

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(415): worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser. http://tfl.nu/daye

Replies (13) Good night (721) Bad night (4684)
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(773): View more from Illinois

Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.

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(773): Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes. http://tfl.nu/41f8

Replies (48) Good night (6170) Bad night (1345)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.

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(617): i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good. http://tfl.nu/gykq

Replies (116) Good night (6531) Bad night (1456)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

This house was built for laser tag.

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(336): This house was built for laser tag. http://tfl.nu/32ag

Replies (14) Good night (9108) Bad night (799)
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(864): View more from South Carolina

So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"

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(864): So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life" http://tfl.nu/u5wp

Replies (175) Good night (53102) Bad night (6381)
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(650): View more from California

I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?

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(650): I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend? http://tfl.nu/l4fs

Replies (46) Good night (9584) Bad night (2176)
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(269): View more from Michigan

Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.

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(269): Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option. http://tfl.nu/dknj

Replies (22) Good night (6524) Bad night (1320)
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(562): View more from California

or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.

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(562): or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her. http://tfl.nu/io8a

Replies (3) Good night (1935) Bad night (1343)
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(330): View more from Ohio

It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.

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(330): It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop. http://tfl.nu/5ysk

Replies (11) Good night (781) Bad night (1672)
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(716): View more from New York

The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.

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(716): The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man. http://tfl.nu/vdpw

Replies (7) Good night (2784) Bad night (705)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"

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(780): They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge" http://tfl.nu/puda

Replies (5) Good night (849) Bad night (1350)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.

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(203): I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship. http://tfl.nu/lj0r

Replies (3) Good night (872) Bad night (421)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.

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(847): I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas. http://tfl.nu/dr57

Replies (3) Good night (1000) Bad night (227)

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