I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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