i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
i black out too much to be "responsible"
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize