Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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