i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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