I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
is wine microwaveable?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
