Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
