Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
