fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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