Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
