hotel room ftw
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
