3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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