i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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