i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
