For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
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i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
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just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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