Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
So gin and wine won't be happening again
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
