What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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