I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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