Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
