You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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