winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
