Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
