Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
thus making me awesome and them whores
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize