Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
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she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
True college students do jello shots in the library
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