is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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