I forgot how hot balto sounded
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
organizing the empties. That sober.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize