and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
