everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Randomize
