We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
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