Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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