Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
