so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
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Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
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He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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