Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
