hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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