she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize