I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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