Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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