too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
