There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
