4 words: hood of his car
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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