It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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