Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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