Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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