I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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