I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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