D3 body, D1 cock
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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