Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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