She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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