what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Randomize
